Snap out of it

I wish it were so easy. I always love when people tell me that, or I feel the need to tell myself. Hey, guess what, not going to snap out of it. The wiring is faulty at the moment and for the third consecutive fall converging upon winter, I feel, GASP, in a state of BLAH. I suppose the "medical" term is Seasonal Affective Disorder. Whatever. Whether such a thing actually exist, shorter days lead to less exposure to sunshine and dampening my mood, or there is just something up that I still haven't dealt with, who knows. But there you have it. Nothing seems to inspire my usually energetic, zest for life self. I sat there in the gym today staring at the bouldering rocks, meditating on their state of randomness. How deep. Climbed up, fell off. Climbed up, fell off. Climbed up, didn't fall off. Normally that's when you feel a sort of euphoria. The learning curve climb. Its very meditative. Not today. Today I wanted someone to notice and no one was going to, not even me. Maybe I will convert my house into a greenhouse with artificial sunlight and lots of plants. A kind of tropical theme would be most suited. My bed could be a hammock. I could cook in a fire pit and wash myself in an outdoor tub. I could get one of those light alarm clocks that start getting brighter and brighter so as to gently wake you from your restful sleep. A radio that plays running water or lapping waves. Ah yes. I would come home every day to a tropical paradise amid the winter blues. Trick my body and mind into thinking that the weather and time isn't changing. If I stick around long enough the earth's warming should take care of all that, right?!?