Sick in bed

I spent Monday and Tuesday asleep instead of at work. My body ached, my head hurt, I was coughing up my lungs and there was not enough Kleenex to contain the amount of mucous that came out of my nose. I know, gross.

I watched bad afternoon television and slept a lot. I tried to read, but that was even kind of taxing and I have not been able to get into three books I have started. Its been a slow month for reading. It occurred to me, however, as I watched various daytime shows - Ellen, Rachel Ray, Martha, Oprah: how do they manage to fill those audiences? It seems almost impossible that for all the talk shoes and what not out there that they could manage to fill and entire audience day after day. I only assume its a live taping, but perhaps I am wrong on that account, which would make it slightly more credible. I just find it hard to believe that there are that many people day after day with NOTHING to do but sit in a studio audience. So if you imagine there are approximately 100 seats in a show room times five shows per week for (let's say for average sake) 45 weeks out of a year. That's 22,500 people per year on one show. Then figure the number of shows out there times that many people. I don't even know how many shows exist. How about 7? 157,500 people total just to go to a talk show. I know its smaller than the population of most places, but really?!? I still can't figure out who these people are that go sit through one of these shows. Do they have plants whose job it is to sit in the audience day after day and get paid? Like at the Oscars, you can be a seat filler for when people get up to go to the bathroom. I found this little discourse I had with myself while on my death bed to be quite entertaining.

As for the shows themselves, I thought Ellen was kind of amusing, Rachel Ray is annoying and a TERRIBLE interviewer, Martha is pedantic and disconnected, and Oprah is Oprah. Today on Martha there was some woman that makes these gorgeous roses out of coffee filters. They look real. It was painful to watch these two women make them and the dialogue made me want to poke the stems in my eyes from shear boredom. Martha asked the woman how much she charges for her roses and it was somewhere in the neighborhood of $75-100. What?!? Sure they last forever and they take as long to make, but I don't need roses that badly. Rachel Ray must have had someone tell her she needs to have more black talent on her show because her guests both days and again tomorrow were black. Either she did not know them as well as she claims she does, or she really is a terrible interviewer. Ellen had on the climbers from Mt. Hood that fell in a storm and survived 20 hours before they were rescued. Their dog took turns laying on them to keep them warm. Everyone loves a feel good story. Yesterday Oprah had these two women on that could make you look 10-30 pounds slimmer just by changing their clothes. The before photos made me want to cry. The majority of these women wore sweat pants or baggy jeans and t-shirts or sweatshirts. One of them was even a teacher who wore such things to work. People?!? This is unacceptable. Do you somehow think by not caring it will make you look like you are more dedicated to your job? No, no, no. It does not cost that much more money to upgrade a little. Ugh. It makes me think of some people I work with and the atrocities they wear. I will never understand why track suits are considered proper attire for work or even jeans for that matter. If there was one thing I learned while living in Europe it was that taking care of your appearance is part of projecting how you want to be treated. If you dress like a slob, expect to be treated as such. If you dress professionally, expect to be treated such. Oh, and according to the what-not-to-wear-girls get a good bra and some decent chonies, like the ones that suck in your belly and cover up your derriere real good.

So there you have it. You have officially been updated as to daytime television land. I return to the land of the living tomorrow and hope to be in full swing by this weekend. There will be interviewing, we hope!

Ciao!