the unstandardized test: Ready to come about

Remember that scene in office space where Peter and Joanna are having lunch and he tells her "I uh... I don't like my job, and, uh... I don't think I'm gonna go anymore." That's how I felt after spending a week contemplating. But see, I'm not allowed to say such things because (a) we're in this terrible recession and I'm just lucky to have a a job, right?!? and (b) I just had many weeks off, so how bad can it be, really. So, I don't tell people that because they tell me I'm lucky to have a job and aren't I on "vacation." Here's the deal about my "vacation." I see it as sort of pointless really. I mean, I love the time to recover, but I don't get to choose when that recovery occurs, I have to wait until schools out, so its not always the greatest. Sometimes I wonder if we had year round school, if life would be less hectic. Its also sort of like the Italian dilemma. Its great to have all this time off, but when you don't have the funds to go anywhere and enjoy it, sort of seems like I might as well be working. Regardless, I don't like my job. That was the conclusion I came to after 10 days away from the chaos. Twenty hours, ten of which were solo, there and back gives you a lot of time to think. I thought I wanted to buy a house, because the market is down and there are some decent programs for teachers, but when all is said and done I couldn't imagine doing my job for long enough to support my buying a home. So, in the end it looks like finding another job and saving more to buy a house makes a lot more sense. The question now is what do I really want to do...

Sucia Island sunset